“I” versus “We”
So often, I hear clients say, I can do this, I can’t, I’m trying, I will, I want to, I don’t have to, I failed, I tried, I’m trying—I, I, I . . .
I reflect to them that as long as you stay in the “I,” you can’t win the battle with this disease of food addiction. This illness is too powerful to be overcome with an “I.” What’s required is a force—an army, a village. What does that mean? It means a recovery support system.
If you stay in the “I” when trying to follow the food plan, you are essentially working on following a diet. What do we know about diets? They work for a minute, and then it’s over—you’re back to using, back to picking up the food.
Recovery from this disease requires a lot of support. It’s certainly nice if you have a supportive family and friends, but they do not understand what you are up against and may even have the illness, too. What you need is a recovery support system—a community of other people who are working to be in recovery from this illness by coming together and sharing their experience, strength, and hope. That’s powerful.
You can find a strong recovery community in 12 step meetings. My favorite in this context is FAA (Food Addicts Anonymous). Other meetings provide recovery support, but the food plans they are built around are different from The Realization Center Food Plan for True Recovery, which is closest to the plan that FAA supports. I also hold in high regard Grey Sheeters Anonymous, as long as the person avoids the substances included on their food plan that trigger cravings. In my book, The Big Book of True Recovery from Food Addiction & Beyond, I discuss culprits/triggers at length.
Attending meetings consistently will provide you with the army/village you need to be successful in becoming abstinent. When you start to look at recovery as “we” instead of “I,” you are on the path to living a life beyond your wildest dreams.